TheRaulrus

Self discipline is the number one trait needed to accomplish goals and lead a healthy lifestyle.

That statement says it all. Self discipline is in fact key to success. Self discipline is in fact key to happiness. Self discipline is in fact what I've been lacking for years.

At home sick from work one morning, I was laying in my bed looking up at the ceiling daydreaming. I was upset not just from being sick with an upper respiratory infection, I was more upset about how I let myself go throughout the years, mentally and physically. I would say the last four or five years haven't been the greatest for me. Sure I had my ups throughout that time but all together the downs outweighed them. It's easy to slip into bad habits if you're not careful. Some of mine were eating a lot of fast food, spending money foolishly and taking unnecessary days off from work. None of which benefited me at all but I didn't seem to care. I was just going along with it. I did seem to care however when my mood started changing for the worst. I was becoming more and more depressed and having dark thoughts. As I continued to daydream during that one morning, I began to put it all into perspective with two words: Self discipline. For years I took the path of least resistance and what did it do for me in return? Nothing. But as they say, it's better to learn something late rather than never.

The remainder of this year for me will different. Self discipline is like a muscle that needs to be worked out in order to stay strong and healthy. There are steps needed to do this and I'm more than willing to accomplish each one.

Reason for this post is that self discipline goes hand and hand with poker. You have to be disciplined in this game if you wanna be successful. You have to be willing to create precise bankroll management, play at stakes within your bankroll, study away from the felt, put in the hours on the felt, etc. Without self discipline, all else fails. Another reason for this post is that maybe I'm not the only one with self discipline issues and if a person who reads this has them and feels the same way, you're not alone. We're all human, we make mistakes, we're individuals of habit. It's those who take a step back from their wrongdoing and reevaluate their current negative situation in order to create a positive one, will succeed in time. Like I said, it's better late than never.

When I first started playing poker a little over 3 years ago, after experiencing some winning live sessions early on, I really felt that this could be something I could pursue. Of course I went through downswings, experienced the negative side of variance, busted my bankroll, built it back up only to bust again due to poor bankroll management skills, but that vision still hasn't gone away. I'm not sure why even after experiencing all the negative aspects of this game, I still have this vision that it will work out someday down the line. I'm the type of person that when I'm into something, I'm all or nothing with that something. It can be a both good and bad trait to have. I've only had a few interests in my life so far at 26 years old. Music, playing guitar more notably, was one, poker was second, and health and fitness was third, and I've been slacking terribly with the third one I must add. I truly enjoy learning about music, music artists, different genres, playing guitar, etc. but it's difficult in this day and age to try and make a solid living with music. Health and fitness could be a good field to be in with a lot of earning potential, but my desire isn't there. I enjoy exercise, but for me, having a career revolve around health and fitness would drive me nuts because I know me, I like food, I like a lot of it and it would be a constant back and forth internal battle of guilt and unpleasantness. Now I left poker last. Poker is without a doubt the hardest way to make an easy living but for some crazy reason I'm all about it. I still have this vision that it can create some financial freedom for me if I buckle down with it correctly, study and put in the time. I have this vision that if I could place well in a big tourney, it could create a nice cushion for me. Take some worry out of life and it's financial demands. And like I said earlier, I still have this vision that someday it will work out. It's not even that I'm overly optimistic, I guess it's just because I know who I am and what I like is what I want to do. I look at the pros who've made it and the sacrifices they made for playing this game as well. I'm never once jealous of any pro out there who's made a good living at this game. The only thing it does for me is inspires and motivates me. Galfond, you inspire me. Koon, you inspire me, Sulsky you inspire me, everyone here on RIO in some way shape or form, inspires me. I'm not saying I want or have the capability of becoming a millionaire from poker, I'm not even sure if I could be a hundred thousandnaire from poker, but I have this feeling and this vision that something will work for me with this game. It's a feeling that's been staying with me for a while. I may sound crazy with all this, but life is just too short to say woulda, coulda, shoulda. I fully understand we are out of the golden era of poker and it's a lot more difficult to try to make a go at this, but I think if you put your mind, body and soul into something your passionate about, the universe is gonna get outta your way and let you do you. All I can do is be the best me I can possibly be and if it doesn't work out, which is understandable, at least I gave it a shot because I would feel so much worse being older and thinking to myself, I wonder if?

"Whether you admit or not, we all dream of that moment when you can change everything, when you can reinvent yourself. But rarely does that opportunity ever present itself. And when it does, how many of you would recognize it when it comes? And even if it did, would you have the guts not to just cash in while you were ahead of the game, but to gamble, to really go for it, go for all of it. These sorta dreams you never admit to anyone. The dreams you think of before you push in all your chips. The dreams you wish for with your eyes closed right before you blow out the candles. I mean let me ask you this: When those guys back in Lexington and Concord who were upset about paying taxes, fired the shot heard around the world, did they know what they we're starting? Or we're they just looking for some action?"

Happy Grinding :-)

Been a fan/player of poker for years but I'll admit that I neglected to watch the classic poker movie, "Rounders". Finally did the other day and I wanna watch it at least 100 more times because I loved it so much. If that movie doesn't spark your interest to play poker, I don't know what will. "Pay dat man his ma-ney."

I took the 2014 year off from playing poker to pursue other interests, music being one of them. The passion to play again is there and I couldn't be more excited to get back into the swing of things. I'm planning on eating healthier, continuing my workout routine, studying and of course playing more. Just wanted to say that I love the RIO site and community. In my opinion, it's still the best forum out there run by truly great players. Hope you all have a great 2015 and I'll be looking forward to checking out this site on a daily basis. Take care all.

Six months ago, I wrote a poker journal thread titled, "Taking The Leap Next Year". Six months ago I was obsessed with poker and truly believed that I could become a full-time player. That was six months ago. When you happen to say things from an early standpoint with the rest of the year left still in play, there's a pretty big opening for uncertainty because no one truly knows what tomorrow will eventually bring. I was at a point where I had a firm grip on poker strategy and play. I was studying and playing constantly becoming more comfortable and confident each time I sat down at the table. Even though things on the felt seemed to be going well for me, things off the felt weren't. My health was in question due to my increased weight gain and poor diet. I can't blame my weight gain just on me and me alone though. It was a side effect from one of the three antidepressants I was taking. Throughout the years being on them, I worked out, took pretty good care of myself, but my appetite was off the charts. I never felt full which can be a discouraging and annoying feeling. When April of this year came around, I had enough and wanted to wean off the correct way with the help of my doctor. Then I came to a point where I felt, if I can wean off one, lets just wean off all three together and be done with it, and so I did. My doctor gave me a one month time period to wean off all three a particular way and let me tell you, it was the absolute worst experience I've ever been through in my entire life. First and foremost, everyone reacts differently to antidepressants because everyone has different brain chemistry, so it's extremely difficult to pin point the problem and to pin point how long you should take to wean off if you have to at all. I went through every single withdrawal side effect imaginable both physical and mental. To be honest, I wasn't sure if I was going to make it through this summer at all. It was that bad. Even though I was going through all of this, I still knew I couldn't give up. Wouldn't be right. Now, these medications had been working for me years prior but it did come along with a side effect which was increased appetite and weight gain, but all and all, I was functioning and happy for the most part. So I had a choice: Be absolutely depressed with a chance of giving up or go back on the medications that were working for me and tweak the things you are now aware of to avoid unhealthiness. I chose the second option. I tweaked a particular medication I was taking with the help from my doctor and went on a better path by eating healthier, not excessively and exercising on a regular basis. Lost 30 pounds doing so as well. 237 lbs to 207 lbs. Now at one point, I did wanna play full-time, but I experienced a lot of things this summer that changed my mind. I have nothing against full-time play, but it just wouldn't be suitable for me I realize. The aspect that comes along with full-time play is the emotional swings, not just financial. I had enough of that in my life and I know I wouldn't be able to handle it. I respect anyone who can though. As of recently, I have been diving back into the enjoyment that poker gives me. Love reading about it and most of all, playing it. My aspirations have changed. For me, I view poker as a profitable side hobby which I will take part in mostly on the weekends and work my regular 9-5 job throughout the week. I guess the whole concept behind my story is, choices are everything in life. Think about the action your going to take before just making an impulse decision. Poker is a lot like life in a way and that's why I value the game so much. The more correct decisions you make, the greater the outcome will be.     

Situation playing live 1/2 nlhe was that I was utg and dealt KK. I made a simple 3 bet to 6. 4 others ended up just calling after. Flop came: 2 of clubs, Queen of clubs, Ace of diamonds. I made a c-bet, about 3/4 of the pot, a couple after me folded but player in 7 seat re-raised. Player in 9 seat folded. Came back around to me in the 1 seat. I called. Turn: 4 of spades. I checked, he raised, I called, probably should have known I was beat by him having an Ace but I still went with it. River was a 7 of spades. I checked, he went all in, I had him covered so I called. He had 2 pair with him holding AQ off suit. If I raised more in the beginning, 4 or 5 bet rather than 3, would that have been better?

If you happened to read my post in the Poker Journal section on here titled, "Taking The Leap Next Year", you are already aware that I will be pursuing poker as a full-time occupation by the start of next year. Things have to be accomplished first before I take poker on full-time, like saving a certain amount of money for both my bankroll and living expenses, getting back into good physical shape through exercise and eating more healthy, and also create a more balanced type of lifestyle that won't just be totally focused on poker. I'm in the midst of doing these things, but I am encountering some setbacks. First off, both my parents totally disagree with my future aspirations and think it can't be done. They think I should just keep it as a hobby and continue working full-time at my father's business, which is a great business overall, but it's never been for me. I've been working there on and off now for quite some time. It's a family ironwork business. We assemble and install custom hand-made, hand-forged iron railings, fences, gates and etc. for Upstate NY and beyond. 3rd generation family business and potentially 4th if my cousin and I decide to take it over one day. My cousin is very interested in doing so. Me on the other hand, not so much. What I take away from working there though is learning work ethic, responsibility, and discipline. Traits that will carry over to whatever I choose to pursue next. It's just kinda disappointing not having the support from your parents, but it's understandable because in reality, no parent wants to see their son or daughter lose money, which can happen playing poker. They just don't seem to know that I will be treating my poker career, if you will, like a business. I'll take what I learned from working at my family business and apply it to poker and it's lifestyle. And second, I do seem to be in somewhat of a mental slump. I haven't been motivated to exercise or even eat healthy for a little while now. I know that in itself is clouding my drive, but I'm having a hard time getting out of this slump. I've been in slumps before and made it out, but this one is lagging on and I don't know why. All and all, sometimes I feel that I've been running bad for quite some time and wondering if my luck is gonna change for the good. With that said, I am optimistic about my future and think poker will work out for me one way or another. It's just a matter of weaving through these obstacles beforehand that will make me feel a lot better. Just venting a little.