JacobSpeelt

I feel you, and you doesn't seem to be stupid for this game. You need to try one more time to make sure that you can handle with it. Good luck

Looks like an unreal story. I knew a guy who played for money without saying his parents when he was only 12. He read a lot of books about playing for real money, then he started playing poker for money. Everything was fine, and he even had a special tactic. He was indeed one of the best player who I ever know. But his luck turned away from him one day. No winnings at all from that day.
I hope that's not your story and everything will be perfect.