CantGetRight

Player1 posts small blind [$0.50 USD].
Player2 posts big blind [$1.00 USD].
** Dealing down cards **
Dealt to Hero [  9h 7h Js Jh ]
Player3 folds
Player4 raises [$3.50 USD]
Hero calls [$3.50 USD]
Player6 folds
Player1 folds
Player2 calls [$2.50 USD]
** Dealing Flop ** [ Ah, 9c, Jd ]
Player2 checks
Player4 bets [$6.96 USD]
Hero calls [$6.96 USD]
Player2 folds
** Dealing Turn ** [ 5d ]
Player4 bets [$15.78 USD]
Hero calls [$15.78 USD]
** Dealing River ** [ 3h ]
Player4 bets [$33.00 USD]
Hero raises [$119.34 USD]
Player4 calls [$86.34 USD]
Player4 wins $292.16 USD from main pot
Player4 shows [2d, Ac As Ts ]
Hero shows [9h, 7h Js Jh ]

I have no hud, no money, no friends, nobody like me-borat

So with my hud currently not working, I have been playing blind and it is seriously more difficult. I have limited myself to only 2 tables, to make it easier, yet it is still hard to remember basic things like how often someone raised utg etc. On the river it was a decision between shoving and calling. Obviously can't fold on that board run out. I thought the shove was okay because of his bet sizing kind of had me thinking he didn't have top set. But something I had not thought about is what can call my shove that plays the hand like this. I don't think he ever has 99 and without a hud I don't know if hes going to even play aj this aggressively.

I know good players would obviously bet 3 streets here as wide as a9+ My feel for this guys style of play is hes not messing around too often. In retrospect I think I should call here 100% of the time given the information I had available. But looking for second opinions. Call or shove?

I'm almost 100% sure it was by phil galfond. All I remember from the video phil says something like, you have to balance the times you snap call preflop with AA with the times you snap fold them preflop.He also said you should call shoves with AA preflop according to its equity preflop vs someones shoving range
So if someone shoves a range that I have 80% equity against with AA i should fold AA 20% pre.

At first none of this was making sense. But its phil so I trusted it and have been doing it for awhile now. With mixed results at best. Does anyone by chance know which video this one was? Thanks guys.

I don't have an advanced degree in mathematics but would I be at least close in saying poker is as complex as some of the most advanced mathematics concepts out right now? A lot of people say poker is an infinitely complex game, so maybe it is much more closer to a science than being "just a gambling game" like black jack or definitely roulette or slots.

I personally would agree with the general view society has on poker players. They think we all are degenerate gamblers with a massive addiction problem. However the reason I refuse to agree with it, is because it is just not correct. When you tell them oh but wait poker is different from slots. They laugh at you and scoff at you and say oh you are just saying that because you are in denial you have a gambling problem etc. 

Perhaps in my case I do have a gambling problem but my experience with poker is that if you have a 5th grade class room and you ask all the students what they want to be when they grow up. One says I want to be a doctor and the teacher claps, then another says i want to be a lawyer, and everyone claps, then you have another student say I want to be a online nosebleed professional poker player, the room will go silent and the student will surely be sent to the principles office as the principle calls that child's parents demanding to know why their kid wants to be a degenerate gambler?

I think we all get the point I am trying to make here. Society looks down upon professional poker players. Poker players who play professionally are stigmatized to no fault of their own. But because of the ignorance and lack of knowledge of the general public. Online gambling being illegal surely doesn't help inform people of this gap in knowledge they have. No in fact it strengthens their conviction that online poker is bad and that's why it is illegal.

So I go back to my original question. Do you think poker would be a respected profession in society if everyone knew how complex the game is and how much skill is required to become a professional at it? One could even argue that being a professional poker player is one of the hardest jobs to in the world because it requires multiple skills from abilities in mathematics, psychology, speed of processing information, physical stamina and so much more.

I use to think the only way to approach poker is to just keep pushing and pushing how long you can play before reaching your breaking point. I'm talking increasing the amount of tables and hours you play more and more each day. If a new table opens I always sit there and I try to act like I'm some sort of poker legend who can take on anyone at any time for as long as possible. Not willing to quit playing till the games die out. But if you read my other thread you can see this type of thinking has lead to my demise because I eventually play for so long at so many tables at such a high intensity level that I just snap. Perhaps it is because I am stubborn at times.

I've always been the type of person who goes all in on something or doesn't do it at all. I always felt if I couldn't do it right why do it at all. But that kind of mentality isn't working for me. I'm looking for a new approach. I'm not sure if there is a video on here that discusses things like planning out sessions and adjusting to how you feel. But I would love to watch something on that. I'd also like to watch a video that discusses my issue of just feeling so restless inside and full of rage if I have a losing session. Some people aren't bothered by losing but I just can't seem to function unless I win. I just feel completely terrible and lose hope and am willing to do anything I can to end the day up money. Even if it means risking my entire bankroll. Which I have done countless times:/

So what I am saying is whatever my approach is, it doesn't work. Playing poker whenever you feel like it doesn't work for me. I need some kind of structure with a bailout plan in case for some reason I am unable to play. I need a way to lose 10 buyins in a session and not have it effect my sleep or mood. I need a way to say okay I'm going to play 4 hours today and quit even if I'm down. But the way I approach the game right now is just so unorganized and the games I decide to play are based off of feelings instead of what is the right game to play. I think playing a game because you feel like it, isn't a good enough reason ya know?

Sure some might read that line and ask why would I ever continue playing this game if I haven't been able to beat it over 10 years of playing it. Well I still have the poker fire inside of me. I feel like at any moment my big break is going to come through and I will reach the nosebleeds or at least midstakes and make a living out of this game. I'm a pretty smart guy with a poor work ethic and degen problem and although my tilt has improved over the years I eventually reach my breaking point mass tabling hours on end and hit the roulette table to vent out my frustration.

It seems like no matter how much money I win or lose in a session I find a reason to hit the roulette table at the end of the day. I just get this thrill of putting 20-25 bucks on 0 and getting that big hit. I've come up with all kinds of reasons and excuses to play roulette. Things like well if I get hot in roulette I will have the bankroll to play the stakes I want or if I get hot in roulette I can have enough money to move to mexico and play on pokerstars. Well looking at it I won about as much money as anyone could ask to win at roulette at one point I turned 100 dollars into 4500 dollars playing roulette over a 2 day period.
Clearly 4500 is enough of a bankroll to grind with yet I would keep finding reasons to play roulette and well would miss 0 hundreds of times and lose it all. So the amount of money I have to grind with isn't the issue here that much is clear.

I don't know what help there is for a guy like me at this point I'm still young(25 years old been playing since I was 15) but obviously I am running out of time at this point because I've had so many chances and failed miserably each time. Even when I had a break here or there at the roulette table it wouldn't matter because some way or another I would find a way to lose all of my money. I don't know if I have a gambling addiction or not. But I'm not ready to give up on the dream just yet. I've put in too much time in the game and enjoy it too much to quit now.

If anyone has any suggestions that don't involve quitting I would love to hear them. Even if its something as simple as saying I need to take responsibility for my actions or read a book or something. I just have this issue where I get overwhelmed with excitement and my emotions spiral out of control and the only thing that seems to make me come back to reality is if I lose all of my money.