Some great observations you have and thanks for the detailed comment.
Notice how you are quite focused on results here, of course you should not lie about something if it ain't so. But make it a habit of yours to always throw in some ideas of how you execute and what you do, how you do it, in any discussion you have about poker and stay away from talking about results if you can. The more you talk about results, the more you empower them, the more you will stay focused on them.

About your moving up, instead of just looking at it as moving up, play the bigger game a little more often and increase slowly over time, but do not play it all the time yet.
Simple examples could be, you play once a week when you feel really fresh or twice a week. That is of course if you still want to implement playing higher.
Remember how you used to play much lower and once you got used to a bigger game, it was not a problem anymore?
You are making too big a deal out of the moving up part, make it a smaller deal, do the move in smaller steps, it does not have to be one big step and never look back. In fact even if you are fully integrated into 200NL. you can still have days where you play 100NL instead. Don't make it a be all end all thing.
Hope this gives some ideas :)

Thank you very much !

So here just as we have it with Runittwice, you are already talking about how much you are down in the first 10 minutes.
Look at how zoomed in this is on such a tiny tiny, non existent sample.
What do 10 minutes of poker mean in comparison to the body of work that you either have or will in the future put out?
What does 1 hour mean?
1 week?
and when you say, it's 3betting time, yeah I get it, I understand, but this is not useful to talk like this. If people are 3betting too much, you don't just say, oh it is 3betting time and my good hands do not get respect.
Instead you talk about how you will exploit and punish people that play or 3bet too wide and how you will execute the patience to wait for your moment instead of thinking how it is happening to you and how you would do better if this and that...
I am not attacking you btw, not at all, I am just notifying you of potential dangers in the way you might think or speak with others.
All in good faith and love :)

Also

Am I playing it too safe with 65 buy ins ( = 26 buy ins for 10nl) for 4nl? Would you have some advice around that Chris Pimmer

Hey Jeff_ fair point, however, then we would have to look at the idea of motivation in the first place, but this goes a little too deep for a post.
Overall it is not totally bad to keep an eye on some things, if they are indicators to how you want to move and behave. If your motivation however comes from an external factor i.e. money, fame, then this will also create a potential downward spiral in many directions. You might make your self worth or how you think about yourself dependant on this thing and thus, when you run really bad, now you are in your mind not as good a person or you are just doing something wrong all the time and are unable to get yourself ouot of it (all in your mind).
Then you start thinking, oh well, I just never had the discipline to do this or that and that's just what it is. Discipline, or willpower however, is not the key thing and if you think that it is the main factor for all things then you will find yourself also on quite the roller coaster at times, or even on a pure downward trajectory, because if you do not have enough, you will always think you need to build it, and if you do not know how, then you can easily become hopeless.
So, these extreme mindsets are quite volatile, sure there are a select few for whom they work, and one of the reasons for that is actually luck, being in the right situation at the right time, not having created havoc in other areas in your life, so that you were able to take advantage of something that came up and yet for others, they are simply built in a way that they idea of hardcore discipline and external factors for motivation keeps them afloat long enough to overcome some of the hurdles.
But this is the exception not the norm.
If you keep these ideas (results orientedness, discipline, willpower, goal setting) within reasonable ranges and don't depend on them for your self worth, you are likely not to trouble yourself too much.
Everything you do, will always have some new branches of the game tree that will be created, some of them you will be aware of, perhaps because you aim for them, while others only show up later or you are not aware that they were created in the first place.

Oh and just because something has not shown up as a net negative for you, is not evidence that it is positive. Things need to be evaluated both in context and in long term or scalable effects.
Eating one huge burger might not be a problem, but just because it does not immediately kill you, does not show you that you should be eating 10 each day for the rest of your life.
Or if you come home from a tough day at work and you want some immediate energy and then eat something highly processed and sugary, it might provide some relief in the short term, but if you do this every day, you will likely at some point gain weight and everything in your life will become more difficult, because you might have a much harder time to move around, perhaps get out of bed, in the morning everything hurts and aches and thus, the short term motivation or relief it gives you to have that little snack, can turn into something that costs you a lot long term.

The most fascinating thing to me is that most of the spiritual / philosophical stuff (Seneca, Tao, Mush etc) are now being backed by science (Huberman, Peterson etc)

They point to the same.

It is so easy to get zoomed in on one thing and thus lose touch with what is actually even more true.
Which is why learning to zoom out is one of the key things to learn.