When I made the opening, I have already played a session today. Then, I played a smallish nightly session and ended up looking at my results, so for the sake of transparency, here they are:

Now, no looking at results until Mar 31.

Please show lifetime rake paid. I'm super curious!

Remember my sample is pretty much nit... oops fullring.

Same thing ;)

GL!

So, today I was thinking a little bit about why so many professional poker players, even very successful ones, end up not enjoying the game that much, or as much as they did when they began their careers. A lot seem to dread even sitting to play, count the days/weeks/months to retirement, and only play because they need the money.

A few years ago, I remember reading a piece in a sports magazine about football players, active and retired, who smoked. It also touched on things like why so many of them, close to retirement or shortly after, ended up gaining a lot of weight (brazilian example on both would be Ronaldo). And last but not least, why so many players (this happens a lot here in Brazil at least) go out so much, to nightclubs, bars etc, even when they are not supposed or allowed to do it. The writer's opinion was that, on highly disciplined professions, where you can´t really have a life out of the game if you want to be the best, where everything turns around the sport, the whole need to keep eating well and exercising and, again, not being allowed to be "normal", these young guys end up just doing the entire opposite, becoming as unhealthy as they can in some cases, overcompensating for all the sacrifices they made for so many years.

So yes, I can totally understand when someone who seems like a very successful poker player, says they don´t really love the game anymore. Considering poker really requires sacrifice, for months/years at a time, I don´t really know what would be the solution though.

Low volume but swingy month:

I thought a lot, while I was on the bad stretch you guys can see, about my whole approach to the game, and some lessons about myself. For example, from the rational and technical standpoint, I understand very perfectly what is going on. It´s the mental part that still fails and leads to some, let´s say, anger. Knowing I´m still prone to feel this way is good (still lots of room for improvement). Seeing that I felt this way but still kept playing according to my gameplan is also good (I am improving :) ).

Also, I will never get tired of remembering how bad my logistical approach to the game still is, and it all comes down to a simple word, discipline. I wouldn´t be surprised if a big % of the reason I have a low winrate at the micros is just this very simple factor. A few passages from a blog of someone I really respect:

"So here's my theory: I think if you're losing at low stakes, which despite the rake, should be the easiest place to win, then you are most likely breaking down at the logistical level. That means there is something fundamentally wrong with the way that you approach poker as a profession.

Just do me a favor and picture this. I am going to paint a picture of a hypothetical poker player. This person plays poker about 80-100 hours per month–not a ton of volume but definitely a respectable amount. When he does play, he makes sure that he is as focused as he possibly can be. He's not distracted by anything that's going on around him, he doesn't have his phone nearby, and he's not surfing the web while he plays. He's just hitting his volume goal and playing really high-quality poker, month in and month out.

He also doesn't have any major health issues. He sleeps well, he exercises enough, and he puts good food in his body. He studies about 20 hours per month, sometimes more when he's really feeling it. (That includes reviewing all of his pots that he has played over 10 or 15 big blinds to make sure he is able to justify all of the significant decisions he's making.) He has access to a coach who is better than him who he meets with on a regular basis. He's not under any extreme financial pressure because he has alternative sources of income, at least for now until poker becomes more profitable. He also doesn't have any major bankroll management issues and he has a solid plan for how and when he is going to move up in stakes.

Basically he knows his plan is solid, so he sticks to it. He doesn't worry extensively about his plan failing. He doesn't try to do so much that he completely burns out or forgets to enjoy his life outside of poker. He doesn't expect that success in poker will be the most difficult thing in the world. He just knows that if he lines up enough good decisions in a row, eventually he'll win enough to move up to mid stakes, and then mid stakes will eventually become high stakes.

Now imagine this player is doing all of that, and he is LOSING at low stakes.

You can't picture this person because he doesn't exist."

https://www.mobiuspoker.com/blog/the-reason-you-are-losing-at-low-stakes

Well, it´s not the first time that I set discipline goals, make the effort and it doesn´t work, but I also know myself enough that if I keep trying despite the failures will lead to success eventually.

My updates will be quarterly from now on. Worrying about results, the constant look at results I bet most of us keep doing all the time, is a very big distraction. This is probably one of the biggest trials in our self discipline, but we shouldn´t avoid important things just because they are difficult right?

Focus, focus, focus during the sessions. In everything. From preparation, to table selection, note taking, to playing focused even if that means more sessions but shorter ones.

Study obviously.

No expectations, thinking about the future or whatever. Always staying in the moment, enjoying the process, taking it seriously but still having fun.

Cheers