Hello. I am not an expert in this field but after reading your story, I believe you would benefit from proper bankroll management. You are already ahead of the curb with obtaining money since you have a decent job and your life seems to be in order. What you should focus on are the stakes you want to start off with and have the proper roll for those stakes. Depending on a persons situation it's ideal to have at least 30 to 40 max buy ins for the stakes you choose to play at. An example would be: 1/2 NL Min BI - $50 - Max BI - $200 ($200x30=$6000) $6000 would be the proper starting roll for one to make a go at the 1/2 NL stakes to withstand variance. You may happen to know this type of information regardless, but after reading your story proper bankroll management was the factor I could asses the most out of it. Best of luck to you.

I started playing well before i should have. I was 14 and played freerolls and play money on my brothers account, then my mom made a account on bodog for me and deposited 50. I lost it within a hour. I would constantly deposit 25-100 and couldnt win. And when i did, similar to you, it didnt cover my losses. I stopped in 2007 and didnt play until late 2009 when i was 18+ and could play on my own. I dropped a 500.00 deposit because i couldnt manage my money. A close friend was a successful 5-10 grinder and sng specialist. He took me under his wing and coached me on a lot of basic things i was terrible at. Within 90 days i was able to sustain a profit on a regular weekly basis. Im by no means a pro, but i havent busted many accounts since then.
As mentioned above, BRM is crucial. As well as knowing when to stop, when to switch games, and when to take a break.
I had a lot of good decision making skills, a good instinct, and was not a bad player. But i played above my means, would buyin with 50% of my roll. And then tilt off my whole roll.
Having someone to coach you even on minor things could be a huge help. Best of luck

you're mind set is your problem. if you title your post 'i'm terrible' then you have 0 hope in poker.

if you tell yourself something it is going to materialise- especially if it is something negative. for example, you tell yourself over and over you can't talk to girls. you go up to one and because you have repeated this process over and over in your head you give up before you have even started the conversation. well, it is the same in poker.

if I am about to start a session with a negative mind set I simply won't play and just go do something else. as 0EV is > than -EV. so it's better to play no hands and lose nothing than to play shit and lose a bunch.

again, the reason you are winning small and losing big is your mind set. you probably play decent when you're winning but terrible when you're losing. as you adopt a victim/degen/tilt mentality during your losing session and you lose probably 3 or 4x what you 'should' lose had you been playing your A/B game.

you need to go read some books, on mindset, on life. gain gratitude for even being alive, imagine how many people would snap their hand off to swap positions with you and live your life! so then when you play a poker session and lose you don't really care because you still live a great life, and losing a little money at poker doesn't really matter at all in the grand scheme of things.

if you had OTB's poker skills but your mindset you would probably only be a slight winner at NL25. but if you had a high stakes reg mindset and your poker skillset your win rate would triple or quadruple overnight.

there's a small chance i'd coach you but I don't really coach and i'd probably charge you more than you'd be willing to pay. I personally think you need to sort this out yourself. you don't need some guy telling you the optimal turn check raise frequency vs a turn delay c bet of 80%, you need to gain a new perspective on poker and then take it from there.