Warning long post*

Here is the deal, I've been playing poker for about 3 years now and didn't have any success (mostly due to not understanding you have to put in a lot of study time and volume, your ordinary degen fish. I also never before really talked strategy in any kind of game, so I wasn't particulary interested about game theory in particular, until I've lost enough money and felt enough bad and degen about myself to make it stop). I'm 21 and didn't go to collage for past 2 years, because I didn't really know what I want to do in my life, so I have worked and played poker on the side as a 'hobby', that was a very -EV hobby in a lot of terms (not going out with friends and socializing a lot, developed some really bad daily routine and never had schedule, so I ended up spending way to much time on youtube/facebook and other shit and in the end, not gaining anything from that). It is as if last 2-3 years of my life are complete blank, I feel bad, because I feel I threw my youth out of the window in certain way, but I did kind of learned to isolate myself from things, which is good.

Next year I'm going to collage, and have about 1k€ BR, which I need to turn into 15k€. Why is that? Because I'm going to live for 4 years on my own in another town during collage and probably after it. Don't want to go into family stuff, but it is quite bad, because my divorced parents have a lot of their own anger/emotional problems, and are throwing it down on me and the whole family. I'm trying to stay positive however and pull the best out of it.

Enough about this, I have about 8-10 hours per day for poker for the next 12 months, before I go to collage (I don't know how much time I will have to grind during that, so I want to spend time as smart as I can right now).

I was previously mainly a cash game player, but I recently transitioned to MTTs and enjoy them by far more + you don't really have to go into theory too much, to make them profitable as player field is extremely soft from what I've witnessed.

So, how does one that is starting 'kind of' from start and wants to make 15k€ in 12 months balance poker study time, grind and other activities, without really falling asleep and feeling drained throughout the day? Note, we are playing MTTs and can't know how long are we playing, so I suppose poker grind is the last activity we are doing in the day. *note, I was previously already enrolled in a coaching program, but it didn't work, I burned myself out and the strategy they were selling didn't reall work out for some reason. I see a lot of people I worked with on skype still losing money on micros after already being in that program for 1 year +.

Here is a schedule I've come up with for my week. I have some final papers to work on for highschool (I've finished all years, but didn't complete the SAT or w/e you wanna call it (because I didn't really go and even try to complete them), that allows me to sign up for collage. But I don't think that is too much of a deal from where I'm from tbh. I'm gong to study computer science and learn as much as I can in that span of time, that is why programming is also on the schedule, + I wanna go into investing/trading route and finish some certificates in that way also, after I'm done with collage.

SCHEDULE - > http://www.slikomat.com/slika/6042325.htm

Now, I know there is a lot of going on and that I'm not usually going to stick 100% to it (I have to make myself food, clean myself, clean room, etc..), but it is a close assumption to what my schedule is going to be like.

How do I explain to my friends/family that I don't have time always for meeting, because I have to play poker etc.. I know you are going to say, 'well if they are true friends, they are going to understand', but this might not really be the case in real life. I have no results to backup for what I'm striving for, I can't just lie to them and say I made 'x' amount of money and I'm making 'x' amount of money per month, etc.. How do I not go insane? How did some of you pros maybe deal with this in the beginning when the path was uncertain and you failed at this 'hobby' for 2 years straight, because you were degen and then saw what poker is really about, onec you started learning the theory and studying it? Also what about not time to keep a track of what is happening in the world? Not having time to pick up a newspaper and figure out what is going on and happened in last few weeks or months?

I need some tips/advice from someone who has been through this hell before and I would really appreciate a respond. I know to make a living I'm going to have to put in 8h/day like any other pro, but how do I manage my other activities and life? Or do I go full isolation bunker mode?

I also feel that cash games would be better for the situation I'm in, but I just fucking hate them to be honest. Or should I just get a regular for this one year and forget about the poker dream. I'm not sure, but I feel like I'm disciplined enough to make it.