The last thread I created and posted in on a regular basis was long ago when i basically just started out playing poker. Since then i made I think two poor attempts of starting something like this again but never really felt it so I eventually stopped.

I have been playing touranment poker for many years. At this point I accumulated over a million dollars in profits with a 60% roi, counting only scheduled mtts its roughly 23-24k games by now, most of my profits I made on pokerstars and most of it within the last few years when i swichted to playing a low volume high buy in schedule. I have a family by now, my son was born early last year. Im still playing tournament poker full time online, 4 days a week, but I plan on eventually either having enough passive income or to have simply made enough money to not have to play professionally anymore.

I want to start this thread out on a negative note because thats how i feel right now as its late at night and Im just out of all my tournaments and thats what made me create this thread so let me just go with this emotion.

I want to start by saying what I dont like in this industry given my own, certainly limited perception of the people within this industry. Now there are a couple of players I respect alot which I think carry themselves and treat others very nicely, but ill leave that out and talk about the types of players that are just way too full of themselves, and there simply are alot of them in poker.
There are many of the considered "top players" in this industry, that are WAY too judgemental towards other players, always either obviously or sneakily saying things that make them seem above the players they talk about. Poker is NOT solved, its not even close yet, but people judge actions of players based on their own background of studying and treat that background as the absolute fundamental truth. When you work with a solver, you cant possibly type in every possible betsize and raise option for any street. So any solution you come up with based on the input that you gave is no real nash or GTO. Multi way preflop and postflop is just starting to become "solvable" wiht a tool like monkersolver, ICM just got introduced to pio for 18 players left, ICM itself is not a perfect model, let alone being able to implement and memorize even a perfect strategy in game etc etc...the game is so huge, there is tons of ways for new knowledge and also still tons of ways to exploit people. Yes piosolver, monkersolver etc are amazing programs, I love pio i work with it alot, thats not my point. Im just missing the humbleness of alot of the so called top pros that a true wise man would show. And a true wise man would know of his own ignorance. Now those players exist on the other end of the spectrum as well, im not just criticizing the gto type players, but their voices become louder as it more and more commonly gets accepted that this is the way to play. But there are others in tournament poker who play a more exploitative strategy with the same ignorance towards their peers.
I find it fascinating how the ego can make you look so ugly. All of those top players would be so much better off showing humbleness, any of those bitter statements towards others just make them look weak. I give an example of the opposite, maybe its just my own perception but I believe its that of many: I believe one of the reasons why a player like Phil Ivey is (or was, since he is not much in the limelight atm) so fascinating, is that he never talks about other players in a judgemental way. He just performs. It makes him look so much stronger mentally than alot of other regs. Now im not much on twitter so I have to guess on that, but I cant imagine Ivey to be the type of player to tweet after a loss something like "meh lost with....to this bad reg" etc or even worse feel the need to comment on and judge a political statement of another player on twitter.

Every now and then im seeking out coachings from some of the top regs, since despite playing those games im personally not connected much in the highstakes mtt world. Actually I have to say given a handful coaches 4 out of 5 were actually great, which might indicate that my perception in general could be a little off. However one of those coaches, very well known coach within the mtt community, has been amazingly arrogant and aggressive througout the sessions with me. I purchased 3.5 hours with him and got them to the price of 3 hours, that was the discount for that prize. I was excited about the coachings, since i knew he was a very good player I could learn something from.
Now the first session he started already quite harsh, when he saw something he didnt like he said immediately stuff like "this is terrible", "this is a complete spew" etc. I was thinking ok fine, dont like the way he says it too much, he could word it differently, but doesnt matter Im still going to learn from this. Also whenever I made arguments for my plays, he shut that down immediately and eventually told me in an aggressive tone im too defensive and i cant argue like this always making up ranges, when we should follow pure logic, while he the point to argue about was really him making up a different range than me and assuming that was the correct one, but not giving any arguments for why his way was more logical than mine. I felt bad after the first session. And Im of the opinion that a coach should not only lift you up in your technical skills, but in your mental game as well. But i continued with two more sessions, he made me write down my strengths and weaknesses. I wrote down a bunch of weaknesses that I hoped to work on with him. One of the strengths I wrote down was being able to manipulate and exploit players in certain situations. So he told me for the next and third session two pick out 5 different hands where i feel like i made great exploitative plays. I picked those hands out, the types of plays that are working alot for me. As an example an overbet turn spot (this btw was quite some time ago by now, Might be 2 years or longer go, back then turn overbets were not as common, they still arent that common today in tournaments but in cashgames they are and probably were already by then). Every single one of them he found a way to say that my play was bad. It really felt like he just wanted to put me down, not really improve my game. Im very confident in my game and knowledge and thats how im talking to other players and coaches, now Im also very open minded though Im always listening to every single new idea. I really even prefer to work with players who play differently than me but have success so i can learn other ways. But idk what it was, i felt like maybe he didnt like me being confident, maybe others treated him more like something higher than them.
The turn overbet, for example, I dont remember the exact hand anymore but i was overbetting some flushdraw type hand on the turn in a spot in which my opponent hand lots of weak hands and had a capped range, now I was betting I think 180% pot or something, he said I should definitely bet smaller, like 110%, I would fold out the same types of hands. I didnt think so, i felt the opponent is much more likely to fold a weak top pair or a middle pair type hand with a much bigger overbet, at that point though i already not felt like argueing much anymore but i still said I kind of still feel like 180% is ok. He got super aggressive and was like "TELL ME WHAT HAND FOLDS TO THAT SIZING THAT DOESNT FOLD TO 110%?!?!! TELL ME!!". After all that berating, he finished the session by saying "let me show you a really good exploitative play", pulled out one of his hhs and bragged about a random bluff that he made.

So by then 3 sessions were done, I still had 30 minutes left with him. I texted him on skype and told him something along the lines of: Hey, the coaching you are doing is good, but I have to say I dont like you as a person so im not going to take the last 30 minutes. I feel like a coach should also motivate his players and not put them down".
He now went on to say how motivation doesnt help at all for the student and that he once thought like this as well etc. He was nice now. So for me the thing was over, no hard feelings I thought ok thats just how he feels like he should do it. I still didnt like it but oh well i still got a bit out of the coachings. He offered me a refund at first for the last 30minutes, then said "ah no you paid for 3 hours so thats fine".
Then he told me "we can still do the remaining 30 minutes if you want to" and now the really crazy thing, he added "but now you would have to pay for the 30 minutes since you canceled the coachings". I was the one who cancelled the coachings, now he wanted to continue and told me to pay for the remaining 30 minutues. I did not even respond to this anymore.
Now the next day, the guy texts me again, saying "I spoke to my friends, none of them like you play in [hand X], so I really think you made a mistake there and you should realize this. Of course I sent them the hh anonymously". First of all I never critiqued his coachings or what he thought of my plays. And then this guy is sending hhs of his students to other people...claiming anonymously but how can you be sure esp wiht someone who behaved like he did.

So yeah, that was one of the worst experiences I had with the people I think are just bad for a healthy and fun environemnt in poker. I had others though but its really late here im gonna leave it at that for today.

Now last but now least, what do i actually wanna do with this thread? Well it was a somewhat spontaneous idea, but im going to give it another shot to make a bit of a journal. I will mostly be talking about mindset here probably, not much about technical game stuff at all and also maybe about some other things and my journey in poker as im planning on becoming a stronger player each and every day. I have proven the consistency over many years, I want to get out of this game not as famous person, please not. I will much more enjoy not being known, but knowing myself im one of the best there are. And thats the plan.